mylifeinboston

To everyone who is (hopefully!) reading this blog, I have to start out with a confession.  I signed up for this gig as a “Boston blogger” and neither of these things is *technically* true…although I suppose by posting this entry I will become an official “blogger” for the first time in my life.  You may be wondering why I’m rambling on about this and why I’ve decided to start this blog that so far seemingly has no purpose and the answer is pretty simple, really.  My life has been *really* screwed up for the past year (more on that later…it’s a teaser to make you come back!) and I just really need somewhere to vent.  The people I used to talk to have all, for one reason or another (again, I’ll explain) disappeared, so here I am, at your mercy.  Eventually maybe even bearing my soul, although the last time I did that I ended up with said screwed up life, so be gentle with me, at least at the beginning

Since I was a little girl, I’ve wanted to be a writer.  I LOVED to read (still do) and so of course, at age six, it only made sense that I would grow up to become a great children’s novelist while falling in love and having the perfect family.  However, in the intervening sixteen years since coming to this fabulous conclusions just a few minor issues have popped up…I’ve discovered that I have *no* (and I mean absolutely NO) talent when it comes to writing fiction.  I’d consider myself a creative person, but I don’t know if this is actually true…at the very least, my talent fails me when it comes to trying to come up with story ideas.  Every time I think I’ve come up with an idea, I realize that I’m just poaching something from a novel I’ve already read.  I even tried to write a humorous story about my life in the last year, but couldn’t figure out what to say or where to start.  That’s when I came across this ad for “Boston bloggers” asking people to comment on “Boston nightlife, Boston sports, swimming , autism, health cooking , fitness, marriage, weddings , politics, housework , old movies, TV shows , college life, sickness, depression, anxiety, and any think of” (I think they meant something along the lines of “anything else you can think of”…at least my writing skills are that good!).  Well, about half of those thing constitute what I am fondly going to refer to as “the year from hell” and a couple others will soon pop up (I’m moving to Boston in exactly a week to start my first job out of college), so I figured here was something I could at least try out.  And with the blogging format it seems like it can all come out little by little in its own time, rather than having to sit down and stick it all in a book…it also allows for me to put in little teasers so you’ll hopefully come back, such as the fact that the other half of that little fantasy (the perfect family in the suburbs) has come crashing down and I’ve now resigned myself to spinsterhood…but that is a *long* and painful story and will probably take several entries to fully come out.

To go off on a little bit of a tanget (and to relate to one of the requested topics…weddings!), one of my best friends is getting married this August and her fiance has this very sophisticated, highly researched (sarcasm here people!) theory that there are really only four types of women in this great big old world.  His background is based on two pretty popular, extremely realistic (again, with the sarcasm…) shows: “Sex and the City” and “Desperate Housewives.”  According to Anthony (the fiance), the types are as follows: the sex kitten (Samantha and Gabrielle), the domestic goddess (Charlotte and Bree), the focused career woman (Miranda and Lynette), and finally the ever-popular damsal in distress (Carrie and Susan).  On a side note, Anthony is marrying the domestic goddess.  As lame and unsupported as this first sounded when my friend first told it to me, I’m actually starting to relate to it and even find examples in my own life (well, see the previous sentence!).  When I think about it, the type of person I want to be, that I’ve always tried to be, is the self-sufficient, balanced focused woman (aka career woman, but maybe not so focused on the career as the self-sufficiency) but in actuality I have to admit that recently I am more of the damsal in distress.  And not just distress…I am the damsal in despair.  Thinking about this deeper, I realized something that these two totally fictional archetypal women had something else in common…both were writers (Carrier with her columns and Susan with her children’s books).  So there it was, staring me in the face…my destiny as a blogger and a possible way to climb out of this pit I’ve found myself in.

My other escape is a literal one…as I mentioned before, in exactly one week, on June 8th 2008, I’ll be moving exactly 454 miles (according to google maps) away from everyone and everything I know here in my Virginia suburb of Washington, D.C. and starting over in Boston.  And I am terrified.  Logically, I know that people do this kind of thing all the time and I’ll be fine, but emotionally I am freaking out…what if I hate the job?  Or the roommates (who I found over craigslist and seem nice but hardly even know) are super-bitchy like my last ones? (another teaser!  more *will* come on this)  Or I don’t meet anyone and just live this pitiful existence going to work and watching re-runs on tv?  Or worse?  I know I have to make this huge step and get away from this whole mess that I currently call my life and honestly, as far I can imagine (which is pretty far!) things can only go up, so I don’t know why I’m so worried.  I just hate change…I’m the kind of person who will stay in a slightly unhappy situation where all the factors are known rather than risk change with its possible downsides (even if the possible upsides are more likely and more numerous), which is how I got myself into this whole mess in the first place.  But I’m trying to learn from the past and venture out of my comfort zone and hopefully it’ll pay off.  At the very least, it’ll all be chronicled right here in this blog which I hope will provide at least a few people with something to do during those boring times at work       

That’s all for now…sorry it’s kind of a crappy into, but I think I covered some stuff and I’ll get into the details more later.  So for anybody reading this, thanks for getting this far and remember…if today sucked, tomorrow can only go up…at least that’s what I’m currently telling myself. 
  

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